“Marriages may end, but parenting is forever…“
You’re facing one of the most difficult challenges of your life—navigating a separation or divorce. You worry about the emotional toll on your children, the escalating costs of legal battles, and the uncertainty of the outcome. The traditional court system feels like your only option, but deep down, you wonder if there’s a better way to resolve your legal and parenting issues without turning your family’s future into a battleground.
Divorce Mediation and Co-Parenting Coaching offer a compassionate, cost-effective alternative to the adversarial approach. Through mediation, I help you and your spouse make decisions together about your family’s future in a respectful, neutral environment. We deal with all legal issues that need to be decided: creating a parenting plan and resolving all financial issues including division of marital assets and debts.
Co-Parenting Coaching, either as part of the divorce mediation process or on its own, empowers you to create a healthy, cooperative relationship with your ex, ensuring your children feel supported and secure. It’s a solution focused on separating your “couple relationship” from your “parenting relationship”, protecting what matters most—your kids, and making life easier for everyone.
Mediation
The end of your marriage is a stressful time. Fear about the future can bring out the worst in people and it can become very difficult to discuss financial and childcare issues.
In Mediation, couples work with a neutral third party to resolve all issues related to separation or divorce, such as child custody and access, asset and debt division, and support, ultimately resulting in a binding Separation Agreement.
Mediation provides long-term solutions. Couples sort the issues out for themselves, within the framework of the law, and the outcomes reflect what they need and want. The entire process is much more respectful and also more amicable.
Dominique’s Innovative Mediation Process
Divorce is a significant life change, and navigating this transition requires support and understanding. I have designed a mediation process that is intended to guide you through this challenging time with empathy and expertise. I am here to ensure that you BOTH feel heard, respected, and empowered to make informed decisions.
Once we’ve opened your Mediation File, the mediation process includes:
- Onboarding Call: I’ll book a brief joint meeting with both of you, over Zoom or in person, where we will begin to discuss your unique situation, outline how I can best support you through the mediation, go over some key information and discuss next steps that will set you both up for a successful mediation experience. This initial conversation is crucial in setting a tone of mutual trust and understanding and setting expectations for our working relationship.
- Individual Sessions: Individual sessions with the mediator are the foundation to a successful mediation. These sessions allow you to express your needs and concerns without reservation, and gain clarity and confidence to move into joint sessions. Your individual sessions are both conducted during one half-day to maximize efficiency.
- Joint Mediation Sessions: Over two separate half-days, I will meet with you and your spouse together to discuss the various practical, legal, and financial issues that you raised during your onboarding. My role during these joint sessions is to facilitate these difficult conversations and ensure a balanced and productive dialogue that respects both parties’ perspectives.
- Written Summary and Deciding Next Steps: At the conclusion of our sessions, you will receive a written summary of all decisions and agreements made. This will be an opportunity to discuss next steps which could include drafting a formal Agreement, booking additional joint mediation sessions, or booking co-parenting coaching sessions for either or both of you to focus on strengthening our co-parenting relationship.
- Pre-Recorded Learning Modules: This is the thing that sets my mediation process apart from other mediators. You will be granted access to an online portal with pre-recorded videos that I have created to provide you with valuable information as you prepare for each step of the mediation process. You will have access to these recordings long after our work together is complete to provide ongoing support as you move forward in your co-parenting relationship. These resources are designed to equip you with everything you need for a successful mediation outcome.
Why Choose Mediation?
With over three decades of dedicated experience in family law and divorce mediation, I understand the complexities of ending a marriage, especially when children are involved. I believe that with the support and guidance of the right mediator, this process can lead to a constructive and hopeful future – one where your children thrive. My child-centered approach is built on a foundation of compassion, respect, and non-judgment, ensuring that you are supported every step of the way and that the decisions you make are ones that serve you well in the years to come.
The Risks of Going it Alone
Without the help of a professional mediator to deal with the practical, legal and financial issues that need to be dealt with at the end of a marriage, couples often find themselves stuck in a cycle of conflict and negotiation that can drag on, increasing costs and emotional toll. This can negatively impact your emotional and physical health, your ability to show up for your children, your work performance, and even your future relationships.
The Benefits of Working With Me
Choosing to work with me means investing in peace and stability. With over three decades of experience in family law and divorce mediation and having been through divorce myself, I understand the intricacies of this life transition. My unique method offers a streamlined mediation process, promotes fairness, and facilitates communication so that you can make sound decisions in a timely and cost-efficient manner. It also lays the foundation for positive future interactions between you. It sets you up for a successful co-parenting relationship, which is the best gift you can give your children going forward.
The Mediator’s Role
My role as your mediator is to help you to: identify goals and shared interests; gather information; develop options; and communicate openly, honestly and civilly.
I facilitate the discussions between you and your spouse. I provide a safe environment, encourage both of you to actively participate in making decisions, and help you to focus on goals for the future (and not on blame for the past).
As a mediator, I make sure that both of you have the same complete and accurate information. I also help you to develop options and to consider the consequences of those options so that you can make informed decisions.
I remain neutral to the decisions reached by the other parties. I do not take sides, I do not make decisions for you and I do not determine what is right or wrong for your situation.
The ultimate goal of Mediation is to help communicate so that together you can develop a mutually acceptable and binding agreement. If necessary, I will recommend when the assistance of a financial professional might be appropriate.
Why Mediation Works
Increasingly couples are turning towards mediation. It is faster, less expensive and more consensual. The truth of the matter is that most cases settle before trial, often at the courtroom door. This is after months, perhaps years of legal battles, costs and massive amounts of emotional pain.
Interest-based mediation works for many reasons, among which are the following:
- The process in mediation is collaborative rather than confrontational.
- Mediation acknowledges and values all human needs.
- Mediation does not rely on memory or credibility.
- Mediation allows the parties to decide the outcome.
- Mediation encourages creative remedies.
- Mediation is future-oriented, as opposed to law which tries to resolve what happened in the past.
- Mediation surfaces hidden agendas.
- Mediation lets quiet people speak and talkative people be quiet.
- Mediation encourages the parties to actually tell the whole truth, including the subjective and emotional truth.
- Mediation connects parties through empathy.
- Mediation permits the mediators to model useful behaviour and techniques for avoiding future conflicts.
- Mediation allows both sides to win.
- In mediation, the focus is shifted from people to positions and from positions to interests.
- Mediation reveals the parties’ deeper motivations.
- Mediation allows for constructive feedback without the appearance of judgement.
- Mediation empowers both sides to say no.
- Mediation lets the parties compromise and save face.
Is Mediation right for me?
If the following is important to you, then Mediation should be at the top of your list of options:
- Mediation can make you feel better about your separation.
- Mediation creates an environment in which both parties feel they have been treated equally and impartially.
- Mediation helps the couple create a clear picture for vital things such as finances, living arrangements, and a parenting plan.
- Mediation allows couples to feel confident that they are dealing with the end of their marriage in the best way possible.
- Mediation can allow you to work through your legal issues in a way that preserves and in some cases strengthens your parenting relationship.
- Mediation allows for a prompt resolution, so you can move forward and return to the business of living your lives.
Why Your Spouse May be Reluctant to Come to Mediation
Even with all of the positive aspects of mediation, some people are hesitant for the following valid reasons:
Beginning the process makes this a bit too real and they are not ready
One partner may not be as far along in the separation emotionally as the other. It may be necessary to slow down the process a little to ensure that both parties are willing and able to participate fully in mediation. Mediation is a process that will go at your pace, making sure it is comfortable for both of you.
Assumption that since the other party contacted the mediator first that we are now on their side
A mediator is simply a neutral third party that will help you have the conversations that you need to have with your ex-partner. We cannot take sides and we do not have any decision making power.
Concerns about the cost
The cost of mediation in both financial and emotional terms is significantly less than the legal process. The cost is split between both parties.
Unclear of the process or why they would need it
The mediation process allows you to sit down with your ex-partner and try to sort things out yourselves. If children are involved it can help you vent emotions that will assist you to move forward positively in a co-parenting environment. Your mediator will help guide the conversation and highlight areas that will be required to proceed with a separation agreement.
They are already convinced that using a lawyer and battling everything out through the courts is in their best interests
It is certainly your prerogative to choose the legal process right from the start. When choosing this option, both sides often end up with a situation that doesn’t meet the family’s needs. The judge will make decisions based on the best interests of the children and what the parenting arrangements have been to date. It is really not about what “you” want or “your” best interests. It can be very costly, very lengthy and very emotional as both sides fight to convince the judge of the merits of their position. Mediation does allow you to have the legal process as a fall back and usually helps you to at least work out agreeable parenting plans together in most cases.
Prenuptial Mediation
During prenuptial mediation an impartial professional assists people who are considering marriage or cohabitation to explore and reach agreement on relevant financial and family matters. The couple identifies the issues, considers the options, and understands the impact. They mutually reach decisions regarding ownership in or division of property, support obligations, family issues, or other matters that they deem important.
Benefits of Prenuptial Mediation
Open Discussion. In a prenuptial mediation all the issues and potential problems are brought into the open for discussion in order to make decisions that will meet both your needs.
Collaborative and Non-Adversarial. The prenuptial mediation process facilitates the discussion of sensitive and emotional issues in a non-confrontational way.
Empowering. You mutually decide what is best for you. Prenuptial mediation gives you an opportunity to find creative ways to reach an agreement that is tailored to meet your unique needs/interests.
Fair and Equitable. A prenuptial agreement is not just about protecting one’s assets, but also about ensuring that the agreement is fair and equitable. The best time to make decisions on these issues is when both partners share a commitment to each other.
Strengthens Relationship. Frank discussions during a prenuptial mediation can strengthen trust and solidify the relationship. Open communication is the basis of a strong and healthy relationship.
Separation Agreements
A Separation Agreement is a binding contract that sets out the terms relating to the end of your relationship, such as division of marital property and debts, spousal support, and custody, access and child support if you have children. If you and your spouse have already reached an agreement on these issues, I can draft the Agreement for you to ensure that it accurately reflects your intentions and is legally binding. Both parties would then be required to see a separate lawyer for independent legal advice, which is usually provided for a nominal fee.
Parenting Plans
Parenting plans help to guide parents through their parenting responsibilities during a very stressful time; they are the roadmap to a successful future of co-parenting. These times may include during separation/divorce, planning to blend families or at any time a change needs to be made to a previous parenting arrangement.
A parenting plan is a written agreement that identifies all of the arrangements that have been made about how the children will be cared for and supported. A parenting plan can include anything that the parents want to put in the agreement and can be either lengthy and detailed or brief and summarized.
The purpose of a parenting plan is to:
- Reduce conflict and confusion for the children
- Reduce conflict between the parents and/or step-parents
- Encourage good relationships with parents and/or step-parents
- Establish normal schedules with regular routines that are age appropriate for the children
Two of the main factors that determine how well children cope during change are how well the parents/step-parents manage conflict and how well they communicate.
Parenting plans help to alleviate some of the confusion children feel about what is going to happen in the future and what their everyday lives are going to look like going forward.
Mediation services exist to help guide parents/step-parents through this process and others, in order to reduce further conflict and ensure that the focus remains on the best interests of the children.
Parenting plans contain information about how the children’s medical, emotional, educational, spiritual, physical and social needs will be met. The process of creating a parenting plan makes big decisions more manageable. It will also reduce conflicts in the future as many possible areas for dispute will have already been discussed and planned for.
Parenting plans provide continuity and structure for the children throughout this very unstable time.
This planning document will evolve over time and modifications and/or additions can be made as parents/step-parents become more familiar with their new roles or as the needs of either the children or the parents/step-parents change.
Division of Marital Property
Typically marital assets and debts are shared 50/50. However, there may be exemptions (something that was owned by one person prior to marriage, a personal gift, or injury settlement), each person may want to keep their own RRSPs or pensions even if it means the split is not balanced, and some couples choose for one person to have a larger share of debts or assets for their own personal reasons. As long as both people understand what their rights are under the law, and they both agree, they can make almost any decision they like in regards to their financial situation.
Frequently Asked Questions
Do I still need a lawyer if I choose mediation?
You are required to retain a lawyer to advise you of your legal rights, review the Memorandum of Understanding created in the mediation process, and provide independent legal advice to convert this agreement into a legal contract. Beyond that, you can consult with a lawyer as little or as much as you want at any point in the mediation process.
If I need to hire a lawyer, why should I also pay for a mediator?
Resolving family matters through mediation, with lawyers involved at appropriate points, should save you money. The mediator charges a reasonable hourly rate, a cost that both divorcing parties share. The process tends to be much quicker and less adversarial with a mediator.
Because you’ll be making decisions together, you’ll have the chance to discuss each decision within the context of your new financial and co-parenting situations. By taking a well thought-out and detailed mediated agreement to your lawyer, you’ll ensure the most efficient use of your lawyer’s time.
Am I likely to obtain a better settlement by hiring an aggressive lawyer?
In almost all instances, the answer is an emphatic “no.” If you hire an aggressive divorce lawyer, your spouse will be compelled to do the same. Your legal bill will grow astronomically as your lawyers battle their way through discovery, and hire an army of experts. The financial pie that you and your spouse are fighting over will dwindle, and you will likely end up feeling that you never exerted any control over the process. If you have children, you may subject them to extreme stress as you fight it out with your spouse. Divorce is hard enough. Don’t make it harder by trying to “crush” your spouse. You’ll end up battering yourself to pieces in the process.
What if one of us isn’t ready for the divorce?
In some cases, one spouse is “ahead” of the other spouse emotionally. He or she may have been thinking about separation long before initiating the divorce process. In this case, the spouse who just “got the news” may be need some time to adjust. Quite often, the reality of divorce doesn’t sink in until several mediation sessions have passed. Mediation can still work well, but the mediator needs to ensure that both spouses fully understand the nature of the discussions. In some instances, the mediator may suggest that the spouse who is struggling to cope with the reality of divorce visit a therapist.
Is divorce mediation only for couples that get along?
No. It’s a common misconception that mediation is only an option for divorcing couples who have a good relationship.
You and your former partner don’t need to agree on issues or even like each other to enter into mediation. However, you must agree that you want a sensible, affordable way to reach an agreement that works for both of you and that you want to put your children’s needs first.
What is the cost?
We charge an hourly rate and our fees are shared between both parties. We charge for time spent in mediation as well as for any time spent on your file outside of mediation. We do not charge for our initial meeting where we discuss the mediation process and determine if it is appropriate for your situation.
I think Mediation might help. What’s my next step?
For more information, please contact us by phone or email. As mediation is a voluntary process, we will need to have a discussion with both parties before the process can begin.
What Clients Are Saying
If you can get to mediation, Resolution Law is amazing!!! I can’t say enough good things about Dominique! She made the process work for both of us and was fair.”
– JM
Working with you was the best decision I have EVER made for our two boys. It was so helpful to have you there to help navigate those difficult and scary moments in the early stages. What do we do with money? What does the schedule look like?! You helped me with all of it. Our boys feel like we have “one family, two homes”!!!!!”
– MR
Co-Parenting Coaching
At the heart of a peaceful post-divorce life is a stable and nurturing co-parenting relationship. I understand all too well that navigating the shift from spouses or partners to co-parents can be profoundly challenging, but you’re not alone in this journey. My role as your coach is to guide you through transforming your relationship dynamics to create a supportive environment for your children and for each other.
Why choose Co-parenting Coaching?
Co-parenting coaching isn’t just about managing the logistics of parenting across two households; it’s about fostering a relationship built on respect, understanding, and mutual goals. With over three decades of experience in family law and specialized expertise in divorce mediation and co-parenting, I offer a unique perspective that combines legal insight with compassionate coaching.
Getting Started with Co-Parenting Coaching
Starting your co-parenting coaching journey is straightforward:
- Initial Consultation: Reach out via email here to schedule your free initial consultation. This session helps me understand your unique situation and tailor my approach to meet your specific needs.
- Customized Coaching Plan: Based on our initial discussion, I will develop a personalized coaching plan that addresses your goals, challenges, and the specific dynamics of your co-parenting relationship.
- Scheduled Sessions: We’ll set up regular sessions, either in person or via a secure online platform, to provide flexibility and consistency. Each session is designed to build on the progress made, ensuring continuous progress, and the timing of sessions can be adjusted as needed.
- Ongoing Support and Tools: Between sessions, you’ll have access to resources and tools that support your co-parenting journey. I’m also available to address any urgent concerns or adjustments to your co-parenting strategies.
- Review and Adapt: Over time, we will review the outcomes and refine our approach if necessary to ensure it remains aligned with your evolving needs and circumstances.
By following these steps, you will be empowered to foster a positive co-parenting relationship that nurtures the well-being of your children and supports your personal growth post-divorce.
The Risks of Going it Alone
No one expects you to know how to create and sustain a positive co-parenting relationship on your own. Trying to do this without support can lead to persistent conflicts and misunderstandings, creating an environment of stress and instability for both parents and children. Clients who have invested in co-parenting coaching with me often arrive with complaints about:
- Poor communication that escalates disputes rather than resolves them
- Inconsistent parenting approaches that can confuse and distress children
- Added emotional strain that gets in the way of personal recovery and affects your ability to parent well
The Benefits of Working With a Co-Parenting Coach
Choosing to engage in co-parenting coaching brings numerous advantages that significantly impact your family’s well-being and your personal peace:
- Structured support to improve communication, which leads to fewer conflicts and misunderstandings
- Alignment on parenting values and strategies, providing a consistent and secure upbringing for your children
- Emotional and practical tools to handle the challenges of co-parenting, supporting both your children’s adjustment and your own well-being
Your Path Forward
Embarking on co-parenting coaching with me means taking a significant step towards securing a happier, more fulfilling future for your family. By investing in a cooperative and respectful co-parenting relationship, you lay the groundwork for not just enduring but thriving in your new family dynamics.
Let’s work together to create a co-parenting partnership that supports the extraordinary life you deserve after divorce.
Give your children the gift of a “One Family, Two Homes” experience of divorce.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is co-parenting coaching, and how can it help my family?
Co-parenting coaching helps parents who are separated or divorced navigate the challenges of raising children together. It focuses on improving communication, aligning expectations, and creating a peaceful and supportive environment for your children
How does co-parenting coaching differ from mediation?
While mediation is typically focused on resolving specific disputes, co-parenting coaching offers ongoing support and guidance to help parents improve their overall co-parenting relationship. Coaching helps parents develop new communication skills and tools to handle conflict more effectively in the long term.
Can both parents attend the sessions, or is it beneficial for one parent to participate alone?
While it’s ideal for both parents to attend, significant progress can be made even if only one parent participates. Coaching empowers you to create positive change in the co-parenting dynamic, which can influence the overall relationship.
What if my co-parent and I have very different parenting styles?
Co-parenting coaching helps you find common ground by identifying shared goals and developing strategies to address differences in a way that serves the best interests of your children.
How long does it take to see results from co-parenting coaching?
Every family is different, but many clients begin to notice improvements in communication and reduced conflict within the first few sessions. The goal is to create lasting changes that benefit both parents and children.